SARS, Patriarchy and misogyny

It’s silly that men think that feminists are trending #NotAllSars as a “retaliation” or because we are “happy” that men are killed. Not at all, we are just taking a step back. History is saddled with thousands of cases where women fight with men only for the same men to turn around and molest the same women as booties of war. Classical examples:

  • Men and women fought for the Arab Uprising. But what happened, men turned around and gang groped the women in what is known as ‘Taharrush’.
  • In the United States, Oluwatosin was among those who frontiered #BlackLivesMatter when George Floyd was liked, what happened? Men turned around and killed her.
  • In the heat of #BlackLivesMatter campaign, the video showed Black Men molested and dumped a lady in a public trash bin.
  • Many women were shot and killed by present and previous partners.

    It is quite simple, women are tired of fighting with for and with men, only for the men to turn around and harass them. NO; We are not happy about police brutality,  but YES, we will take a step back if that is what it takes for us to keep our safety.

    #NotAllSARS is not a show of ‘excitement’ on the part of feminists, it is, but to expose the ridiculous nature of VICTIM BLAMING.

    It is an EXCRUCIATINGLY BIG LEAP IN THE FEMINIST MOVEMENT, clear evidence that most women are discarding like liability and picking themselves first the same way men do. Women are becoming selfish about their self-preservation. Blacks didn’t gain freedom by empathising with their colonial Masters and worrying about what will happen to their big plantations. Hence it is a great way for men to see that women will no longer protect the backs of the same men who hurt them. This scenario shows the close link between the police and men’s brutality. It’s all about power play and putting others into senseless subjugation.

    It also exposes how insensitive it is for men to hijack the feminist discuss and divert it to something irrelevant like ‘not all men’s or ‘there are still good men out there’, and it shows that men are not the only one who has a monopoly of dark humour. Women are complete humans and also have similar traits too; hence can be sensitive and also be insensitive.  Gone are those days when women pat men on the back for giving below the minimum. Women nowadays will give with the same measure you give, women will give back. Women are no longer playing the ‘bigger person’ in the face of OPPRESSION. Yes. We too can be nasty if we want.

    You are angry that women find “sarcasm” or “humour” in police brutality, yet these are the same men who create a long football thread when a woman recounts her harassment story. One of the guys was even called out on his hypocrisy when he victim-blamed women but demanded the end of SARS. What did he say in response? “The case is different with women”. To him, SARS treating men based on how they are dressed and men treating women based on how they are dressed are two different things that should be tackled differently”.

    The issue here isn’t oppression, it is about WHO WIELD THE POWER OF OPPRESSION. Will the same mem calling us insensitive today stop saying #NotAllMen and still victim blame women tomorrow? It is becoming more evident that men worry about oppression only if they are the victims.

    All of a sudden, the Mister ‘let’s debate about women’s right’ understand the sensitivity, dangers of red-herring conversations, victim-blaming, consent, need for cooperation in both feminist and patriarchy camp, the fact that it can happen to a loved one. No one wants to debate whether women’s education is important because the issue is on men’s right to live and dress like they want to and most importantly THE IMPORTANCE OF SOCIAL MEDIA ACTIVISM. The same standard you set is the standard used to judge you. We saw these tactics play out in the BLM movement, they say women are also sufferers of racism only for them to turn and kill Oluwatosin. More reason I am glad when women decided to break away and form #BlackWomenMatter to tackle misogyny  (Racism and sexism)

Yes, we care about police brutality and we are deeply hurt, but if this is the sacrifice we will make to make men understand the harm they cause through victim-blaming and the #NotAllMen argument, then so be it and we will do it again and again. NO MORE HAVING THE BACKS OF BLACK MEN DEDICATED TO HARMING BLACK WOMEN.

in the words of Ayana Presley “…If they don’t see the light, they will see the fire”.

If men refuse to understand victim-blaming, they will understand #NotAllSARS. Shalom!

JD Njeb is a Nigerian student, Writer and Gender Activist.






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